Skip to main content

Home Should Never Hurt


I was recently driving home on a beautiful fall evening, one of those days when a perfect blue sky was giving way to a beautiful sunset.  As I admired the glorious colors of fall as evening approached, I also noticed the warm lights coming from neighborhood houses, making them all look inviting.  I pulled into my driveway and felt that familiar feeling………………it feels so good to be home.  Home should be that place where everyone is comfortable and knows that they are loved and wanted and accepted.  Sometimes the chaos of dinner, homework, ballgames, housework can intrude on the peacefulness of home, but even with that, Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz was right……………. . there’s no place like home.

Unless……. you live in a home where domestic violence exists.  When you live there, you probably drive home without noticing the beauty around you.  You are not anticipating being at home with joy; you face it with fear.  What am I walking into?  What have I done wrong today? ……I don’t think there was anything, but I am sure there will be.  No one feels comfortable, loved, wanted or accepted.  This environment is difficult for everyone, but especially for children.  Kids are often afraid to have friends over because they have no clue what may happen in their home.  They can’t concentrate on homework, so they fall behind at school.  Meals are chaotic or sometimes non-existent, so they may go to bed hungry.  Sleep deprivation is common because they may be afraid to fall asleep or awakened by an incident of abuse.  Studies show that being subjected to trauma at a young age can alter the normal brain development of a child.  Sometimes these kids become bullies at school or become the victims of bullies.  Unless their living conditions become known to the school their teachers may never know what is causing their inability to concentrate, to stay awake in class or to learn as other kids do.  It is difficult, if not impossible, to learn when you are hungry, tired, angry or traumatized.

Domestic violence is a crime that happens in the home.  It has long been considered to be the business only of the people who live in the home.  Friends and neighbors notice signs, but traditionally have ignored them.  Ignoring the violence is not the answer.  Domestic violence is everyone’s business.  If you hear or see evidence of abuse, call law enforcement.  A victim may not want to talk about the abuse but let he or she know that you care and are available if needed.  Befriend the children of the family so that they know you are a safe and caring adult.  Make referrals to your local domestic violence agency.  Join with us as we attempt to end domestic violence and to be sure that everyone has a safe, healthy and happy home.

 

Macon County                                 217-423-2238 (Crisis)                     217-428-6616 (Business)

Dewitt County                                 217-935-6072                                   217-035-6619

Moultrie County                              217-728-9334                                   217-728-9303

Piatt County                                     217-762-2122                                   217-762-2123

Shelby County                                  217-774-4888                                   217-774-3121

Susie Kensil
Shelby County Coordinator
Dove's Domestic Violence Program




Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

“have you talked to a trained domestic violence advocate?"

Have you ever had a victim of domestic violence try and open-up to you about their abuse and you not know what to say or how to handle it? Have you found yourself asking a victim of domestic violence, “why do you stay?” Moultrie County Dove Office understands that without being properly trained on domestic violence and best domestic violence practices, it is hard to know what to say or do when a victim of domestic violence finally decides to open-up to you about their abuse and we want you to be better prepared. Asking a victim of domestic violence “why do you stay” can place emphasis in the wrong place and make the victim feel as if they have done something wrong. In all actuality, there are many reasons victims of domestic violence stay in and return to abusive relationships. Victims of domestic violence stay in abusive relationships for fear for their personal safety and the safety and well-being of their children. Statistics show that a victim of domestic violence is at a 75%

Doing our part to make a difference.

 With so much talk everywhere on issues of violence, once again a topic discussed at the CONO (Coalition Of Neighborhood Organizations) meeting this past month in wonder of how to stop violence from happening in our community. Let’s consider narrowed down, violence begins in neighborhoods, no matter where they are. Cities including Decatur, have Stop The Violence campaigns and rallies in order to take a stand and to bring positivity and hope which is so important! But I wonder, doesn’t the remedy lay within each one of us? We must not close our eyes or turn a deaf ear, right, and when we see something, yes, we must say something, but isn’t there more? Doesn’t there need to be hands reaching out to one another in solidarity and hope with a goal in mind like the future of our family, neighborhood and ultimately our world. It begins in a neighborhood, your neighborhood and mine. So, if you don’t already have an active neighborhood group in your area, will you consider starting one? If so

You don't have to be able to Dance to do Baskets

  Growing up in the world of dance, one of my favorite things to do each year is participate in The Nutcracker Ballet. My favorite part? Giving the audience a magical Christmas experience with the perfect setting of lights, music, glittery costumes, and refined steps by ballerinas. The audience is transported to a magical land of sweets that makes even adults feel like small children in awe and wonder. Of course, that’s just what the audience sees! What they don’t see is the months and months before hand! Long rehearsals, bandage wrapped dance feet, and stage and tech crews working tirelessly so that every detail before the final show is perfected. After several years, I have started comparing the Christmas Baskets Process to that of the process for The Nutcracker Ballet. Starting months and months before, staff and volunteers work endlessly for the exhilarating distribution week to come. With that said, the magical essence of the Ballet experience cannot happen with just the prim