Thursday, September 26, 2013

Hello - meet Daniel

Hello - meet Daniel.  He is 8 years old and lives with his Mom and Dad in a nice 3 bedroom home in a quiet neighborhood.  Daniel is always well kept and taken care of; however, he is often sad and withdrawn.  He has a hard time staying focused at school and has recently started getting in fights.

What others don=t know is there is a secret of what has been happening at home.  Daniel loves his Mommy and Daddy so much but sadly, to him, it seems like they don=t love each other.  They fight constantly; his dad screams at his mom, curses her and says very hurtful things to her.  Recently, Daniel has seen his dad punch his mom really hard, pulled her by her hair and also break things in the house and punch holes in the walls.

Sometimes Daniel runs and hides but he=s a big boy and he wants to protect his mom.  At times he has gotten in between his parents, screaming at his dad to stop.  One time, he saw his dad pull out a knife and threatened his mom with it and Daniel yelled out that he was going to call the police.  But B his mom stopped him and told him everything was going to be ok.

Daniel just knows to keep this secret because he=s afraid his dad might go to jail or he will be taken away from his parents and his home.  He has even asked his mom why they can=t leave and she always tells him she doesn=t want to get a divorce and that she loves his daddy.

And B so the story goes B and often continues B over and over.  Each year, over 3 million children are witnesses to domestic violence.  90% are aware of what is going on in their home and 60% of them are victims of the abuse themselves!  Domestic violence is a crime!  A woman is beaten every 9 seconds!

There are so many barriers that keep victims in an abusive relationship but the bottom line is the abuser has power and control over them and fear itself will keep them there.  Likewise, most victims don=t want the relationship to end B they just want the abuse to stop. 

 October is  National Domestic Violence Awareness Month.  It is important to support your local domestic violence program here at Dove, Inc.  Domestic violence occurs every day of every month of every year.  It crosses all boundaries and affects the rich, poor, educated and uneducated and those of any race, gender, and socio-economic background.  Please join me in taking a stand again domestic violence in our community.  Attend our annual Candlelighting Ceremony on Thursday, October 10, 2013 at 7:00 p.m., at St. John=s Episcopal Church, 130 W. Eldorado (on corner of Church and Eldorado Streets).

Teri Ducy, Director
Dove Domestic Violence Program

Friday, September 20, 2013

October is National Domestic Violence Awareness Month

Each October, the Domestic Violence Program hosts ceremonies in recognition of National Domestic Violence Awareness Month.  These events are called a "Candlelighting Ceremony."  Each county where we offer services,  hosts an event and each one is different -  but each have a time to light candles in memory of those who have suffered the effects of Domestic Violence.  Each event also recognizes those who have survived and those working to end the abuse.

Please mark your calendars now to attend one of these meaningful events.  Show your support to the survivors, to the families of those who suffered and died and to those volunteers and staff members, working each day to make a difference.


Shelby County - Thursday, October 3, 7:00 p.m., First United Methodist Church, 205 West Main, Shelbyville. Come join with us for a short service to recognize those who suffer and have suffered from family abuse. Light refreshments will be served following the ceremony.

Macon County - Thursday, October 10, 7:00 p.m., St. John=s Episcopal Church, 130 W. Eldorado. Decatur. At this event, we will mourn for those who have suffered and died from domestic violence and celebrate with the survivors. Please join us and take a stand in helping put an end to this despicable crime!

DeWitt County - Monday, October 21, 7:00 p.m., Clinton Presbyterian Church, Clinton. Everyone is welcome to attend.

Moultrie County - Thursday, October 24, 7:00 p.m. United Methodist Church, Sullivan. There will be refreshments provided by the CADV following the service.


Friday, September 13, 2013

Domestic Violence Counts

Every year, the National Network to End Domestic Violence requests that domestic violence shelters and programs across the country participate in a 24-hour survey to count how many DV survivors are served during that period. That date is quickly approaching once more. This year the survey is being done from Sept. 17-Sept. 18, beginning and ending at 7 AM.

Last year, the survey returned results of 64,324 survivors recieved services across the country ranging from shelter to legal advocacy to support groups. 20,821 domestic violence crisis calls were answered, and 25,183 people were educated in how to help prevent domestic violence.

Unfortunately, in that same time frame 10,471 requests for services were unable to be met due to lack of funding and lack of housing/shelter bedspace, and lack of staff to serve those who needed services.

Here's hoping that this year, the statistics will be better. If you'd like to learn more about the census and how it works, go to

Friday, September 6, 2013

For Every Girl...

For every girl who is tired of acting weak when she is strong, there is a boy tired of appearing strong when he feels vulnerable.

For every boy who is burdened with the constant expectation of knowing everything, there is a girl tired of people not trusting her intelligence.

For every girl who is tired of being called over-sensitive, there is a boy who fears to be gentle, to weep.

For every boy for whom competition is the only way to prove his masculinity, there is a girl who is called unfeminine when she competes.

For every girl who throws out her e-z-bake oven, there is a boy who wishes to find one.

For every boy struggling not to let advertising dictate his desires, there is a girl facing the ad industry’s attacks on her self-esteem.

For every girl who takes a step toward her liberation, there is a boy who finds the way to freedom a little easier.

Shared by
Mary Hughes
Moultrie County Domestic Violence Program Coordinator

The winds of change are upon us

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